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Christian Counseling Connection
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LAY HELPING
Resiliency: The Golden Attribute
Resiliency is the golden attribute that lends staying power—the
capacity to recover
from setbacks, hardships, or trauma. It is the
ability to spring back
after being bent, stretched, deformed, or
distressed. It includes plasticity, flexibility, elasticity, buoyan-
cy, hardiness, and endurance. It is maintaining “spirit” rather
than being rigid and responding with defeat or discourage-
ment. Coming from the world of physics, the term “resiliency”
emphasizes recovering the original shape due to the inherent
energy in the material that causes it to spring back.
We see this quality lived out in people who suffer trauma,
hardship, and crises of all kinds and, yet, resume effectiveness
in ministry. I have debriefed people after the Asian tsunami,
the Haitian earthquake, bombings, evacuations, and other di-
sasters. One family who went through the Haitian earthquake,
including a five-story building collapsing on some family
members resulting in serious injuries, was haunted for hours
during a medical evacuation without knowing which of their
loved ones were alive or dead. Through it all, they were able to
resume ministry and emerged stronger and even more effective
than before the tragedy. Another family who lived through
the bombing of Belgrade, Serbia during the Kosovo War came
through with superior attitudes and outreach. Over the years,
I have seen that those who emerge positive and resilient have
certain factors in common.
10 Factors in Resiliency
1.
Good ego strength and high self-esteem
2.
A history of previous success in coping with stress;
each success raises self-esteem
3.
Coping skills, such as self-control, deferring gratifica-
tion, and remaining calm
4.
An ability to draw support from others; supportive
community
5.
An ability to reframe a negative situation into a posi-
tive challenge
6.
“Normalizing” difficult experiences and outcomes
7.
Optimism as a mindset and life stance
8.
Positive habits of communication, such as sharing
concerns
9.
Faith in God’s goodness and the ability to find mean-
ing in suffering
10.
Appropriate self-reliance and interdependency